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Ride Machete Jr. Junior Snowboard
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Retail Price: $279.95

Ride Machete Jr. Junior Snowboard

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The Machete Jr. is the ideal snowboard for the (adjective about the whining baby that stole your youth) grom who (plural verb) snowboarding the entire mountain. With a super (adjective you would hear a skier use in an 80's movie) twin rocker, the profile of the Machete Jr. lifts the contact points out of the snow just enough to allow for a catch-free ride that is forgiving for (Polite Plural Noun for "kids who snowboard poorly") and will help provide floatation in (body part)-deep snow. Whether your child is doing a front blunt (Number divisible by 90) - (Food Item) - out on rails or spinning (number divisible by 180) off park jumps while grabbing (favorite salad), the Machete Jr. will have your little (Favorite curse word used to describe children) riding so well that (competing board company's team rider) will look like a (mean thing you might have called your mom when you were 14).

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